Rednecks live here

You might be a redneck if....

...you wear your seat belt as an accessory (Why yes, officer.  I always wear my seat belt) .  And you decorate your yard with old tires.


Photo courtesy of Mr. Dailey and his way cool, totally non-Redneck, iPhone.

Finding time and loosing it again

It seems to me that I am always loosing time. Time slips between my fingers like the dirt I sift in my garden.  Today I had to find the time to sneak off to the library and blog.  After waiting in line (time slipping from my grasp) for a computer to open up (more lost time) I am now blogging with a freinzy not known to me. 

I feel like my time is so very precious, yet I squander it at every opportunity.  I love to loose myself in the land of blog.  I greatly enjoy reading the stories of others; their joys, sorrows and trials put my own into perspective.


Over the Labour Day Holiday weekend my family, along with most of my husbands sisters and brothers, traveled to the Oregon Coast.  We all shared in a precious gift while there; time spent together.  We made many new memories while reliving many old ones.  We attended a wedding and most of us wept at the beauty of the new lives joined together. 

Our time spent on the beach itself ranked at the top of  the list with all of the children

...as well as our dog Jane.

My boys started up a game of Sandball and made some great memories of their own.

All in all, our time spent at the coast was time I didn't mind loosing.  And I daresay everyone else felt the same way.

I hope you all  are able to find the time to make some time.  And find it precious indeed.

Summer in pictures::A Royal Blast

During the balmy days of summer the Rural Firefighters treat the local communities to an Ice Cream Social disguised as a fundraiser. Leave it to those wily firefighters to lure in the locals with the promise of homemade pie and ice cream. Top that off with a down-home fire-hose dousing and you have what the Calamity Folk dub: A Royal Blast.


The Calamity boys took on the task of defending the family's honour in the Water Jousting event.

























Bold Knight Head-Strong takes one for the team.





















The Young Sire, Head-Long, gives it his all while looking especially smart in his stripes and fishes ensemble.




















The Young Mistress shows her support by offering up her best(toothless) chocolate ice cream grin.


























No ice cream shall go unvanquished!! (Or uneaten!)

























No Royal outing is complete without a send off from Princess Grace herself.



Good times were had by all. Peace was restored in the kingdom.



And they all lived happily ever after....

Summer in pictures

Where has the summer gone? It seems just like yesterday I was pining for those dog-days of summer and here I am pining for them all over again.

In an effort to relive those all too fleeting days of summer I decided to post a few snippets from our summer here at Calamity Farm. So, you can expect to do a little bit of catching up in these next few blog posts.

I hope you all have had a fabulous summer!

Feeling French

I stayed over at Maman's last night. We went out for late dinner and picked up a Redbox movie; Mamma Mia. Watching the movie, being lulled by the songs we used to sing together and my teary eyed mother telling me that the young star "Sophie" reminded her of me as a girl, I was struck with a need to just be with my mamma.

This morning as we were strolling down memory lane together, looking through old pictures and nibbling on toasted French Bread slathered in mamma's Mirabelle Jam (sent to her special-delivery from our cousin in France) and the thought occured to me: I CAN BLOG!!

So, dispite my strolling and nibbling I logged in and stared blankly at the screen. It has been so long since I wrote. There have been weeks and weeks filled with tears over the sad state of my blogging ability. What on earth would I blather on about?


In honor of French Mother's Day (belatedly, as it was May 31st) I will blog about Maman.

****

I could tell you how much I love my maman's fabulous collection of silly socks:





I could tell you what an amazing artist my mother is:





I could brag about who I got my green thumbs from:







Or, I could just leave it at this:




Gros Bisous, Maman

Days go by::

December 2008

The days go by so fast. It seems only yesterday...

October 1999

Crikey! Feeling older by the minute!

Cousins: My oldest on the left, sis-in-laws oldest on the right.

Let's talk about snow...

Is it snowing outside yet?

This has been the non-stop plea echoing from all four of my little rascals. (read:NON-STOP) Ever since they got wind of the coming snow storm, my children have been blazing maniacs. Like Bart Simpson and his annoying "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? ARE-WE-THERE-YET???" my kids have taken to chanting the snow mantra: Is it snowing yet? Is it? Huh? HUH? Huh? Is it snowing outside YET?!

Silly kids.

Well this morning my kids awoke to a winter wonderland of snow. Can you imagine the freak out? Probably not.




It was 5:30 am when they woke and it was barely 7 am when this picture was taken.

After fighting over gloves and wool socks for nearly 2 hours I could stand it no more. I sent them out to play in the early morning snow. You know what? It was colder than the dickens out there but they had a blast.

The forecast for the next two weeks is guess what?? More snow and ICE! This is so rare for us here in the Pac Northwest. I just told the kids of the weather forecast and you know, they all started dancing and jumping around singing "We were dreaming of a white Christmas..... and now WE get ONE!!"

Silly kids indeed.

Message in a bottle::

Help! S.O.S! MAY DAY!

Katie is lost at sea. The Sea of Testosterone.

On this night the Calamity boys and a few brave friends have taken over Katie's living quarters. These rapscallions have banished poor Katie to the galley, with strict order not to return without Pizza Pockets, French Fries and lots and lots of Mt. Dew. And cake.

Miss Katie thinks they may make her walk the plank.
If she doesn't stop taking pictures

Dear ones, please send the cavalry . And chocolate. And booze.

Sad day

Today Katie found out her cousin aged 37, has been brutally murdered and the body left behind a dumpster.

The family is heart broken. It is a sad day indeed.

Farm Girl Friday

A tale of two monkeys.

On Wednesday night, the Farm Suite girls decided to join the Calamity fun and have dinner at The Little Farm in the Wildwood. While we were all (only an assumption as you will see later) enjoying a little of this:

These two yard monkey's were doing a little gardening. Aren't they just the picture of innocence?

We found a little of this:

And a bit of that:

Yes, even some of this:

This is my "courtyard", for lack of a better word. It is a small strip of (sorta) grass that runs right in front of the house. It has now been lovingly planted with beans and nasturtiums, that I know of.

If you look way at the back of the yard you can see a large puddle. The two little monkey's had the smarts to even water-in their little garden.

These two monkey's are now so proud of their little "garden" and have as a result caught the planting "bug", constantly begging to "plant" seeds.

Alternative lawns are really popular around these parts. Whodathunk the two yard monkey's were so.... in the know.

Because someone has to do it...

Before we get ahead of ourselves, go ahead, slap me with the slacker of the YEAR award! Just smack me with it, and get it over with...K.


OUCH!


Well, my sweet baby girl turned 6 this weekend and as we celebrate birthdays like the Suite Family (week long partying) I thought that I would be uploading all sorts of cool pic's from our weekend of fun, right about now.


BUT NOOOOOOAH!


We have a problem. My little family, it seems must take a weeks worth of crap survival gear along with us. Where. Ever. We. Go. No joshing here. On Saturday we ( I mean the Gallant Inspector General or Dick Daring as he is now calling himself ) ahem, we, were loading up our 9 passenger SUV to spend the day at the lake partahhh-in' with our friends and fam, our checklist looked something like this:

• sunscreen
• 3 coolers w/drinks, food, cupcakes, frosting, lots and lots of ice.
• BombBQ
• blankets
• coats
• towels and suits
• goggles, life vests, noodles and various other floating thingies
• plastic wear, cups, paper plates, paper towels, wipe-ups
• cute vintage sheet for table cloth
• salt and pepper
• chairs ( something in the neighborhood of 20)
• extra change of clothes x6
• extra shoes
• birthday gifts
• laundry basket for hauling stuff to and fro
• magazines and books to read while lounging on the beach
• lighter for the BombBQ
• CAMERA......don't forget the camera!
• Memory card!!!!!!!
• sunglasses
• hats
• ice cream cones

OK. So. All of this crap survival gear got jammed into our 'Burban and there was barely any room for the kids. And yet we managed to forget the:

• Hats
• lighter
• tongs (plastic forks don't work well for moving boiling hot food around)
• birthday candles (thank goodness for a Dollar Tree along the way)

and, we were short one chair.

I did however manage to squeeze in the camera and I did (really I did) take lots and lots of pictures of all the festivities. But....for the life of me I can't find the camera now. I shoved it into the car as we were leaving the lake. I even had to pull it out at the last second to retrieve a Band-Aid for poor, HeadLong. He sat on a Hornet that was lounging peacefully on his car seat. (read: Poor little guy took the stinging personally. He kept saying, 'Why did it want to hurt me so....Why? I didn't do anything to that bee. Why?) So, I know the camera made it back from the lake...I just don't know what pile of crap survival gear it is lurking in. Frankly I am too lazy tired to go tearing into the piles.

Thankfully I have friends who blog. At least my suite friend had the wherewithal to post about my darling daughters birthday bash. Someone has to do it.

For my Momma

I have such a wonderful mom. Just so ya know.

My mother made the sweetest pair of matchy, matchy, Sunny Day Dresses. She made them in Fern's favourite color, blue.

My mother has been begging me to do a photo shoot of Fern and Fidget in their new Sunny Day Dresses. So, being the good and obedient child I am, I took the girls out and pranced them around the farm for a mini photo shoot. The girls did a good job of obliging me. When I would say turn, they would smirk at each other and spin really fast. When I would ask them to tip their face this way or that, the little twerps would turn completely around.....some peoples kids, eh? I did get a few good pictures of the two of them, despite the insolence.


Here is just a peek at the girls in their finery.

Hey, look! They like each other. At least for a minute.

Sweet.

As we were moving on the next spot, I caught this tender moment. Fidget reached up and grabbed Fern's hand as they walked away from me. This made my heart melt.

Aren't the dresses just the most adorable?? Yes, I know that girls are cute too...

Well, there you go mom. I hope that you like my pictures. The girls and I are very grateful for the beautiful gift of the Sunny Day Dresses. Thank you.

I love you!

Let's review...

When I was thinking of what to post for today I thought to myself, Self, make it easy on yourself, just put up some pictures of all the fun stuff you have been doing lately. Super easy, shmeasy. Well I started the ever so easy process 2 hours ago. Hmmm....

So,here is a somewhat short summary of what our summer has been like so far and Sally sold sea shells by the sea shore....could I have added any more "s" words to this sentence?? Hah! I guess so. :)

Here you go.

Fidget learned to fly.

The kids got lost in the Loch.

I tried out my mad photo skillz on The Fourth. This is my darling, showing me a little love.

The masses; playing in the sprinkler.

On Memorial weekend we camped with a group of friends. I thought I would play Martha Stewart Rachel Ray and make a cake. Note to self: don't make cake while camping. We had lovely chocolate charcoal.

You can read more about this adventure here.

Teaching kids to ride without training wheels is harder on the parents than the children.

One night I strolled into the bathroom to find this thing flapping against the window. From the size and shape of the shadow I thought it was a bat. I, yelled for help. Because it is a well know fact that bats can eat through glass, and I was freaked out by all the freaking flapping. Inspector the the rescue. He yells, (doing his best impression of Mrs. Doubtfire) help is on the way! Being intrigued by the size and shape of it, the Inspector decided to GRAB it. This caused me to suffer a mild coronary. As it turns out I lived and so did the most bizzare, ginormus, hairy moth I have ever seen in my life.

Pretty foxgloves.

I have had altogether too much fun photographing the flora on the farm.

Last, but certainly not least, was the most recent fun; watching my son play ball. Notice home (paper) plate? (That was the Inspector's idea.) Oh, and of course the man child's form. Doesn't he have good form?! I am so proud of that kid.

There you have it folks the longest, short post ever! Have a great weekend.

Got Straw?

So yesterday was a Monday to beat all Monday's in my book. After the toilet water incident, the day only got better. By better I mean, my children were on their best behavior, if you like to watch the U.F.C. (read: Ultimate Fighting something; basically this is a beat the bah-gee-beez outta some dude, show) fights.

Needless to say I was on my last nerve by the time dinner rolled around. I gave a trite report of the days activities to my Inspector and started making noodles for dinner. As I had spent all of my energy being referee, dinner was a no fan fare deal.

After the kitchen was cleaned up and the dishwasher started, children were sent to their rooms to ponder the actions of the day.

When I heard our dishwasher groan and complain, I thought nothing of it. The beast has been on its last leg for quite some time now. But, this noise was slightly different.

As I sat sipping my tequila tea, I decided that the sounds emanating from the kitchen were of a "somethings wrong" sort. Reluctantly I left my serene spot on the couch, to venture toward the garage band sounds echoing from the dishwasher.

I was slightly shocked and amazed at the scene that lay before me.

My first thought was "Wow, I guess it really is broken".

Then, thinking back on the morning incident: "Man, I guess there really is enough soap".

This is the kitchen floor last night:

(didn't I just ask for some one to mop the floor?)

This is the dishwasher as of this morning:

(still foaming at the mouth)

And this is the (invisible) bottle of dishwasher detergent that my oldest, extremely intelligent, teen-age man child, claimed he could not find. He was unable to locate the soap, that was right on TOP of the dishwasher! Notice the proximity to the dishwasher its self? In a fit of brilliance, my son chose to fill both soap dispensers with Extra Strength Joy dish soap.

Here is "the straw that broke the camels back"....

It was just a lucky strike that I had just washed all of the bath towels we own. They were sitting freshly laundered in my ever so finicky washing machine. I am sure that the towels knew what was required of them, for they willingly mopped up the masses of sudsy water with out a complaint. They sit in their now soiled state, in the washer that refuses to WASH. (insert curse words here)

Yes friends, my day only got better and better.

I finished off the day watching the most depressing enlightening movie of my life and sipping tequila hot tea.

I am hoping that today will be a better day!?!

School's in!

Here are the kids getting their instructions at the Horse Clinic we attended yesterday. I think that Head-Long and Miss G were the only one's who haven't heard it all before.



Pre-teen and way too cool for school, Head-Strong was bored out of his mind! He was ready to leave before it was even his turn to ride. He asked if he "had" to ride? My response was "I paid $55 bucks for you to ride; you better get on that horse Mr." His eyes rolled in disdain. The gal running the show did recognize this, thank heavens, and she made Head Strong ride with his hands on his head and other fun stuff. Like mounting up with no block.



Poor guy had a hard time of it too. The toes of his Romeos were too big to fit in the stirrups. As you can see, he made the best use of his long 'ole legs.
The girls were also a bit on the low side. They have all ridden before and were not looking forward to being led around by the teacher. They weren't that freaked out about the craft that was prepared for them either. Although, they made some cute Foamy picture frames and bookmarks.

Miss G and Miss Fidget, along with Head-Long had a blast at the sticker table. The gruesome threesome had stickers and backing paper spread all over the place. I hope that the instructor didn't want to have leftovers for next week~sigh!


Miss G and Head-Long have had a love/hate relationship from the moment they met. One day they are so sweet, blowing kisses and all. The next, they are in a lovers quarrel that would make the best romance novel to date. Miss G once stole one of Head-Long's chicken nuggets, (totally out of spite since she doesn't even like them) and one would have thought WW III had broken out. Yesterday they seemed to be getting along swimmingly. Here they are doing their best impression of cute.

Here are the big girls doing a little "Saddle Club" pose. As well as Miss Fidget, taking her turn on the Old Gray Mare.

All told it took way too long and was sorta lame, but I think the kids had a decent time and are looking forward to next week when they get to do it again. They have been assured that they will be riding on their own, in the arena.


Till next time........

Apologies

Dear Just J,

I must eat crow and apologize for my mean comment to you. I only called you "stinky" because I was frustrated, and having blog with-drawls. The computer is up and running, obviously, and I only had to kick it a few times to get it to turn on. You are a good brother for taking on my dinosaur and bringing it into the 21St Century.

I appreciate all you have done for me, ya little stink!

Love Always,

Your Monkey

Providence

Dearest Aunt Joyce,

Thank you so much for the phone call last night. It truly was providence! I am sure that mom wouldn't mind that you mis-dialed her number and got mine just right.

It has been so long since I have seen the rest of the family. It was comforting to hear all the home town news; catch up on where everyone has run off to and with whom~haha! I miss the big family dinners, with all the food, fighting and of course fun, fun, fun. It seems so unfamiliar to never run into the family in the grocery store, to not wave to them from the yard. For me the adjustment of leaving "home" has been a hard one.

I apologize for using your nickle to chat for so long. It was so worth it to me! I hope it brought as much joy to your evening as it did mine. Ring me again, on accident anytime!

Much Love,

Your Niece