Some days bring with them desire for hot baths and Tequila. Others usher in with only a mild inkling for sneaking a pull from the bottle and hair pulling. And yet, there are days that beat out the drinking and hair pulling days by a good mile. These are the days that make me wonder "What the heck am I doing?" and "If I imploded right now would they actually notice?". All told, my homeschooling is measured in days; good, bad or UGLY.
To say that yesterday was a day of reiteration, is mildly comic. Comic as in; laughing maniacally, making scary faces and wondering what would Bat Man do? If Bat Man were standing in my kitchen, reiterating to my oldest children-for the one millionth time-the importance of obedience, would he mess with the reiteration or just tie them up with his Bat Rope? Or, smack them around a little with his little bat shaped smackie-thingies?? Really, all I want to know is... what would Bat Man do?
Let's just imagine, for stories sake, that Bat Man was in my kitchen (in the form of our new tutor) and he did tie them up with his Bat Rope and smack them around with the little smackie-thingies. And then, while they were still stunned, he offered them a cool refreshing drink of new, unblemished knowledge. Knowledge that sparkled and danced before their eyes. Food of the Gods was poured out for them and they ate it greedily. They sat, flushed and wide eyed, waiting for more. Bat Man opened the doors and windows of their little minds. He knocked down the cob webs and shook out the rugs. He filled a small tool box with Bat Tools and offered it to each of them. "Use it wisely" he tells them in a low voice.
Bat Girl I am not.
So, when I stood before my teen and pre-teen children yesterday, futilely trying to be all Feng Shui and Bat-like in my reiteration of things that Bat Man had taught them the day prior, they stared blankly back at me. Blankly I tell you! "Bat Man would be so disappointed" I told them. "Hadn't he given you that amazing tool box with the tools you would need to make it through this schoolwork?" I pleaded. Blankly they returned my gaze.
Enter the hair pulling and imploding. And the
Let me reiterate.
Some days, I just want to tear my hair out.
((read: I am a contributor for the new homeschool blog Paper, Pencils, Pajamas. Go, check it out!))